Mr. Nice Try

One of the biggest mistakes a guy can make in a dating profile is to try to pass himself off as a Nice Guy. It just doesn't work. Hope is right...you just come across as being a sissy. Truthfully, the guy would be better off just saying what he really means:

"Ever watched a thunderstorm at night in the high desert? Do you want to? "

I want to drive you out to the middle of nowhere so you can't escape.

"I think of myself as a little old fashioned because I still believe in chivalry and manners. I would like to be your knight in shining armor. "

I've watched too many chick flicks with my mother and my sister, so I think this is really what chicks are looking for. I actually think that if I show up unexpectedly at a girl's house and give her a heartfelt speech about love, I think she will have sex with me (and not call the cops).

Oh, and by "old fashioned" I really just mean that I expect dinner to be on the table when I get home every night.

"I want someone who is devoted and most important of all she has to be honest. Honesty is the number one item on my list. Without honesty, you have nothing."

My last girlfriend cheated on me.

"Please do not let the distance discourage you from contacting me. I am in a job and position that I could relocate if that was needed to have the girl of my dreams."

I'm desperate. I'm a cashier at the local K-mart, and I've worked there for the past 23 years, so it would be easy for me to transfer to the K-mart nearest you.